Was My Dad An Underachiever??

Dave H

Well-Known Member
Well, I'm now an orphan, as my Dad passed away 10 days ago at Sechelt, where he had resided the past 50 years.

Here's a link to his obit, posted today.

http://www.inmemoriam.ca/view-announcement-481111-donald-bruce-hadden.html

He was one of those old-timers you see scootering around Sechelt these days and he always claimed he had the fastest scooter in town.

Going thru his house with my sisters allowed me to learn quite a bit about him that I wasn't very hip about before, given I left home at age 16 and didn't really ever live with him after that. His obit covers some of that.

Perhaps the funniest thing we uncovered was all his accounting records from 1965 and 1966 when he owned and operated Hadden's Home Service, where the Petrocan sits today at the bottom of the hill entering Sechelt.
He kept his own books and in his ledger of accounts my sister noted my name. It was on July 5th, 1965, and was for $23.83.
I was in Comm School at HMCS Naden (then) and had bought a 1954 Oldsmobile with a 324 V-8 in it that ran rough.
I talked to Dad and he'd told me to nurse it over to Sechelt when I could.
So, on the July 1st long weekend I went to Sechelt and after the day Saturday we put my car in the shop and removed the heads to do a valve grind.
Sunday we finished up and buttoned it all back together, filled it with oil and some gas and went for a test drive.
It ran great and I remember grabbing Dad and hugging him whilst thanking him profusely.
He said it should be good to go now, and it was.
So away I went.
He never ever asked for any money or anything and I simply presumed it was Dad helping son.

But there I was, on his list of accounts.
After perusing it for a few minutes my sister put it down and picked up the next piece of paper.

It was typewritten and headed: Bad Debts Written Off..1965

And there was my name, owing $13.83 for gasket kit + parts and $10.00 for gas and oil, $23.83 all together.

I never knew until a few days ago, but my own Dad wrote me off as a "bad debt" some 50 years ago. LOL

He was very thorough.

Anyway, R.I.P. Dad, you had a helluva life and I'll always be proud to be your son.



Take care.
 
Sorry about your loss Dave. It is nice that you have many great memories of your time together. That is the most important thing.
 
Great that you have some of these types of things to look back on and remember him by.

Sorry for your loss.
 
My sincere condolences. I just went through the same thing with my mother. I learned a few things after her passing about her I did not know while she was with us. You've got some great memories of wrenching with your dad you can hold on to that mean more now than ever.
 
Very touching story. Sad in ways but made me smile at the end. Makes one think.

Sorry for your lose, I am sure he was a great man as are you. I am sure you made him proud and will continue to do so
 
Sorry for your loss, Dude, but no doubt, you could write a very touching story about this. It would be wonderful therapy and I'll bet it would be publishable as a human interest story. Very touching indeed!
 
Sorry for your loss, Dude, but no doubt, you could write a very touching story about this. It would be wonderful therapy and I'll bet it would be publishable as a human interest story. Very touching indeed!


Thanks to everyone for your kind thoughts. I really appreciate them.

I did write a bit about him a few days ago as a bit of therapy and this is what I wrote.


"He was a rarity in that he'd had three wives by age 65, at which time he became a widower, then enjoyed a nearly 20 year long relationship with his last girlfriend before she passed.
He lived at home until entering the hospital a couple of weeks ago and was fiercely independent, sometimes to his detriment, but he lived a full and active life right to the end.

Born in 1921 he was just in time to be a teenager through the Dirty Thirties when life was very hard at times.
He always told of how his Dad would rent him and their horse out to plough someone's field for three dollars a day. Dad felt slighted that it was two bucks for the horse and one buck for him, and his Dad kept all three bucks too.

He served in the Royal Canadian Air Force during WWII and was stationed at Tofino, now Vancouver Island's "Surf City" but lacking surfers back then.
He was extremely versatile and could fix, modify, change-over or build just about anything, whether wood or metal. He had an incredible wealth of knowledge about tons of things in varying areas and was often sought out by friends who needed advice or help. He was generous with both, as many people have told me.
Today, his body is at the University of BC Medical Research facility as he donated his body to research.

My two sisters and I will end up there someday as we are all mutants, having been born with Nail Patella Syndrome, which came from our maternal side.
I'm living in his house right now and it's a trip poking through all his things and learning things about him for the first time.
He lived here, Sechelt, for 50 years and was a Lion, a Legion member, Commander of the Sunshine Coast Power Squadron two or three times, a Mason and a well known and respected Realtor as well. He also supported a number of local environmental groups as well as the Chapman Creek Hatchery gang.

He fell into the role of Patriarch quite naturally, what with the wives and girlfriends families all staying friends over the years.
He was a Father, a Grandfather and a Great Grandfather as well as Stepfather and Step Grandfather to quite the brood, believe me, and most of them have been here the past two weeks to say goodbye.
He never forgot anyone's Birthday and always sent a card with a small cheque or a $20.00 bill.

For me it's hard to imagine a more peaceful way to pass as he knew how much he was loved by family and friends by the number who managed a visit when he went Palliative.
Sadly, I missed his passing by about 20 minutes, but my sister Lola was holding his hand and talking to him when he took his last breath.
I had spoken with him just before I left and his eyes opened a bit and he squeezed my hand when I told him I loved him and how proud I'd been to call him my Father.

Then I walked out of the room and cried softly while walking through the parking lot on the way back to my truck.
Ten minutes later I arrived at my other sister's home for dinner and ten minutes after that Lola phoned with the news that he'd passed.

So, even though none of you knew him it's been a bit cathartic for me to type this out so thanks for providing this opportunity.
If you're into numbers, he was 93 years and 93 days old when he passed and he passed exactly two months before I will turn 70 and two months and two weeks before his youngest child will turn 65. Oh, and for nearly 50 years his mailing address was Box 93. Weird coincidences, eh?

R.I.P. Dad, and thanks for giving me life."



Take care.
 
...double post.....
 
Brought a tear to my eye, and just brings to mind what is really important in life.
sometimes the "rat race" makes you lose sight of it.
 
Dave, you and your dad just made me laugh tea out of my nose. I bet he was a helluva guy. Sorry for your loss and keep enjoying those memories.


Franko

MILF (Man, I Love Fishing)
 
Dave. Great story. Sorry for your loss. I lost my dad and fishing partner last summer. Speaking from experience the pain doesn't go away but life does get easier. Great story, that's what make memories of you and your father live forever. Never had the strength to put the boat in the water last year but this year lookout. Keep living and fish hard. Killer B's
 
Dave, My condolences to you and your family on the passing of your dad.It is never easy to lose a parent,no matter your age.
 
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A Very Fine Tribute to an obviously Fine Gentleman Dave!
Although we haven't met, I can read into your writings over the years that your Father passed along a great many of his finer characteristics to you.
My most sincere Condolences for your loss.

Respectfully,
Matt
 
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