The following story is absolutely true and the only reason I will share it is that few on this site actually know me....
In my old life before retiring I was a banker in Alberta and one of my responsibilities was overseeing the Fort McMurray region on a Corporate basis..... (loans from 50MM to 250MM). I made routine flights up pretty much every month and on occasion I would do so for a one hour meeting but be stuck up there for the whole day because of the airlines flight scedules.
On this occasion I had a one hour meeting that was to take place around 10:00 am leaving me with the rest of the day until my flight left around 4:00 pm if memory serves me correctly.
Around 1:00 pm I decided to do lunch, I was really craving Prime Rib however, this is not a meal I like to eat alone so I headed off to the A&W instead.... To sum up my lunch, it consisted of a Papa burger cheese and
ONIONS only, an order of
ONION rings and a large
Root beer drink......... I think you know where this is headed.....
I got to the airport a little early, returned the rental car and proceeded to sit and wait for my flight home. I went through security around 3:00 pm and notice a lot of pressure building waiting for the boarding call. Well finally the boarding call came and I found myself in row 13 which is the row with the emergency exit and an additional 18" of leg room as a result. Pretty much as soon as I sat down, two of the biggest oil workers I ever saw proceeded to sit down in the remaining two seats in the row, affording them some pretty good leg room as well.
Well, If you have ever sat in the exit isle, you will know that one of the Attendants will come and talk to you about what to do in case of an emergency. There could not have been more than 30 people on this mostly empty flight and as it turned out the Flight Attendant knelt in the row of seats infront of me, leaning on the back of the seat and giving me the low down of what to do in an emergency.... At the same time the other Flight Attendants started the safety routine so the Attendant in front of me kind of paused out of courtesy and started listening to her co-workers.
Well, I perceived this as an opportunity to maybe sneak out one "itsy bitsy teenie weenie" one as I thought I was going to pass out from the pressure of my A&W luncheon. DO NOT TRY DOING THIS EVER To make a long story short, I lost control of what felt like 200 lbs. pressure and noise was so intense that the Attendant that was kneeling in the seat in front of me nearly lost her balance pushing back in fright and the Flight Attendant that was in the process of snapping the seat belts above her head, stopped in her tracks and sent a frightened disgusting stare right in my direction.........
Here I am sitting next to the two biggest oilfield workers I have ever seen, with sweat running down the back of my neck. Talk about embarrassing, every eye in the plane was looking where the sonic boom came from.......
Soon the safety thing was over and the plane took off. One of the Attendants went into the cockpit ( to tell the pilots what happened no doubt) and soon the usual greeting from the pilot came on. After the usual flight time/weather in Edmonton routine, he proceeded to state that since the plane was mostly empty, IF YOU DON'T LIKE WHO YOU ARE SITTING NEXT TO, YOU CAN MOVE....... yup you guessed right, the two huge guys sitting next to me got up and moved to some much smaller leg space, just to get away!
While I am not very fond of Air Canada, I flew with them for the next year as I was concerned I would be recognized on West Jet!
SS