A good FUNNY thought I would share

[wolf]

With all the pressure and stress of whats going on latrly a buddy of mine sent me this, so im sharing to all of you LOL LOL

TOUGH TO ARGUE WITH THIS ONE.


Indian Chief 'Two Eagles' was asked by a white government official, 'You have observed the white man for 90 years. You've seen his wars and his technological advances. You've seen his progress, and the damage he's done.'
The Chief nodded in agreement.

The official continued, 'Considering all these events, in your opinion, where did the white man go wrong?'

The Chief stared at the government official for over a minute and then calmly replied. 'When white man find land, Indians running it, no taxes, no debt, plenty buffalo, plenty beaver, clean water. Women did all the work, Medicine man free. Indian man spend all day hunting and fishing; all night having ***.'

Then the chief leaned back and smiled. 'Only white man dumb enough to think he could improve system like that.'



WOLF


Blue Wolf Charters
www.bluewolfcharters.com

 

[wolf]

Here is another one for you guys LOL LOL






I THINK YOU ARE THE FATHER OF ONE OF MY KIDS

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him. She says hello. He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from.

So he says, 'Do you know me?'

To which she replies, 'I think you're the father of one of my kids.'

Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, 'Are you the stripper from the bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery?'

She looks into his eyes and says calmly, "No, I'm your son's teacher."



Wolf

Blue Wolf Charters
www.bluewolfcharters.com

 

[Last Chance]

LOL That's great!

Last Chance Fishing Adventures

www.lastchancefishingadventures.com
www.swiftsurebank.com

 

[the runt]

Those are good,got any more

thanks the runt

 

[wolf]

You ask you shall get!!!!!!!!!!!!!





Two men are out just fishing quietly and drinking beer.



Almost silently, so as not to scare the fish, Bob says, 'I think I'm gonna divorce my wife. She hasn't spoken to me in over 2 months.'

Rod continues slowly sipping his beer then thoughtfully says,
'You better think it over, Bob. Women like that are hard to find.'





Blue Wolf Charters
www.bluewolfcharters.com

 

[wolf]

OR


The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep.

Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, 'Kemosabe, look towards sky; what you see?'

The Lone Ranger replies, 'I see millions of stars.'

'What that tell you?' asked Tonto.

The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, 'Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, the Lord is all powerful , and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you, Tonto?'

'You dumber than buffalo $hit - someone stole tent.'

Now thats funny LOL LOL


Wolf

 

[baddogg]

Not fishing related, but funny just the same.

A guy was driving around the back roads of Virgina when he saw a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale. He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The guy goes into the back yard and sees a nice looking Beagle sitting there.

'Do You talk?' he asks.

'Yep,' the Beagle replies.

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'

The Beagle looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA and they had me sworn into the toughest branch of the armed services...the United States Marines. You know one of their nicknames is 'The Devil Dogs.'

'In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders; because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running, but the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger. So, I decided to settle down'.

'I retired from the Corps (eight dog years is 56 Corps years) and signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired.'

The guy is totally amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

'Ten dollars,' the guy says.

'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?'

The guy answers: 'Because he's such a liar... He never did any of that stuff! '

 

[Gunsmith]

Incident
at Cabela's



A woman goes into Cabela's to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's

birthday. She doesn't know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes

over to the counter.



A Cabela's associate is standing there wearing dark shades. She says,

'Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?'



He says, 'Ma'am, I'm completely blind; but if you'll drop it on the counter,

I can tell you everything from the sound it makes.'







She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway.



He says, 'That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel

and 10-LB. Test line. It's a good all around combination; and it's on sale

this week for only $20.00.'



She says, 'It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it

dropping on the counter. I'll take it!' As she opens her purse, her credit

card drops on the floor.



'Oh, that sounds like a Master Card,' he says.



She bends down to pick it up and accidentally farts. At first she is really

embarrassed, but then realizes there is no way the blind clerk could tell it

was she who tooted. Being blind, he wouldn't know that she was the only

person around?



The man rings up the sale and says, 'That'll be $34.50 please.'



The woman is totally confused by this and asks, 'Didn't you tell me the rod

and reel were on sale for $20.00? How did you get $34.50?'



He replies, 'Yes, ma'am. The rod and reel is $20.00, but the Duck Call is

$11.00 and the Catfish Stink Bait is $3.50.

 

[The Fish Assassin]

lol

Take only what you need.

 

[The Fish Assassin]

18 Reasons Fishing is better than zex.

18 - You don't have to hide your Fishing magazines..
17 - It is perfectly acceptable to pay a professional to Fish with you once in a while.

16 - The Ten Commandments don't say anything about Fishing.

15 - If your partner takes pictures or videotapes of you Fishing,you don't have to worry about them showing up on the Internet if you become famous.

14 - Your Fishing partner doesn't get upset about people you fished with long ago

13 - It's perfectly respectable to Fish with a total stranger.

12 - When you see a really good Fisherperson, you don't have feel guilty about imagining the two of you Fishing together.

11 - If your regular Fishing partner isn't available, he/she won't object if you Fish with someone else.

10 - Nobody will ever tell you that you will go blind if you Fish by yourself.

9 - When dealing with a Fishing pro, you never have to wonder if they are really an undercover cop.

8 - You don't have to go to a sleazy shop in a seedy neighborhood to buy Fishing stuff.

7 - You can have a Fishing calendar on your wall at the office, tell Fishing jokes, and invite coworkers to Fish with you without getting sued for harassment.

6 - There are no Fishing-transmitted diseases.

5 - If you want to watch Fishing on television, you don't have to subscribe to the Playboy channel.

4 - Nobody expects you to Fish with the same partner for the rest of your life.

3 - Nobody expects you to give up Fishing if your partner loses interest in it.

2 - You don't have to be a newlywed to plan a vacation primarily to enjoy your favorite activity.

1 - Your Fishing partner will never say, "Not again? We just Fished last week! Is Fishing all you ever think about?"


Take only what you need.

 

[wolf]

A Husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.

'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.

'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans,' he replies.

'Put them back, we can't afford them,' demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.

A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket.

'What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.

'Its my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife.

Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price.'



Blue Wolf Charters
www.bluewolfcharters.com

 

[Gunsmith]

Ouch!![B)]

 

[Gone Fishen]

Following a serious accident the severly injured man neaded brain surgery to restore him back to normal. The doctor explained his brain would have to be built back up to live a normal life. The doctor gave him some options. He could buy some brain of a former doctor at $200 an ounce, from a former lawyer $300 an ounce or a former goverment fish management decision maker at $1 000 000 an ounce.
The man asked all confused, why's the fisheries persons brain so much more expensive? The doctor replied with a chuckle "you no how many goverment fisheries people we have to go through to get an ounce of brain".

I'm setting my priorities. I'm making time for fishing.

 

[twinwinds]

An old man rocking on his porch sees a young kid and his fishing pole walking down the dirt road. "Where you goin' with that pole?" he calls. "Gonna git me some fish with this here fishing pole!" answers the kid. Sure enough, as the sun is setting the old man sees the kid going home with a bucket of fish.

Next day, old man rocking on his porch sees the kid walking down the dirt road with some duct tape. "Where you goin' with that?" he calls. "Gonna git me some ducks with this here tape!" answers the kid. "You can't git no ducks with tape!" hollers the old man. But sure enough, as the sun is setting the old man sees the kid going home with the tape strung out behind him and ducks stuck all over it!

Next day, old man rocking on his porch sees the kid walking down the dirt road with some chicken wire. "Where you going with that?" he calls. "Gonna get me some chickens with this wire!" answers the kid. "You can't get no chickens with wire!" hollers the old man. But sure enough, as the sun is setting the old man sees the kid going home with the wire strung out behind him and chickens stuck all through it!

Next day, old man rocking on his porch sees the kid walking down the dirt road with some ***** willows. "Now hold on just a minute" calls the old man, "wait while I get my hat!!"

 

[twinwinds]

One day, two guys Joe and Bob were out fishing. A funeral service passes over the bridge they're fishing by, and Bob takes off his hat and puts it over his heart. He does this until the funeral service passes by.

Joe then said "Gee Bob, I didn't know you had it in you!"

Bob then replies " It's the least I could do. After all I was married to her for 30 years."[]

 

[Sea Ranger]

Two guys are out fishing in their favorite lake when one of the guys catch an old lamp.
Once he started to wipe it off this Genie pops out and says I will grant you each one wish.
The first guy says "WOW, I wish the whole lake would turn to beer"
POOF....and the whole lake turns to beer.
The second guys says "Why did you ask for that???.... Now we have to pee in the boat!!!

 

[wolf]

Another one for you guys!!!

A guy is 70 years old and loves to fish. He was sitting in his boat the other day when he heard a voice say, 'Pick me up.'He looked around and couldn't see any one. He thought he was dreaming when he heard the voice say a gain,'Pick me up.'

He looked in the water and there, floating on the top, was a frog.

The man said, 'Are you talking to me?'

The frog said, 'Yes, I'm talking to you. Pick me up then, kiss me and I'll turn into the most beautiful woman you have ever seen.

I'll make sure that all your friends are envious and jealous because I will be your bride!'

The man looked at the frog for a short time, reached over, picked it up carefully, and placed it in his front breast pocket.

Then the frog said, 'What, are you nuts? Didn't you hear what I said? I said kiss me and I will be your beautiful bride.'

He opened his pocket, looked at the frog and said,

'Nah, at my age I'd rather have a talking frog.'

With age comes wisdom.

Blue Wolf Charters
www.bluewolfcharters.com

 

[wolf]

and!!!!!!

DON'T MESS WITH THE FARM KIDS !

A young farm boy comes down for breakfast. His mother asks if he has done his chores.

'Not yet,' said the little boy.

His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he's a little ticked off so when he feeds the chickens, he kicks a chicken.

When he feeds the cows, he kicks a cow, and when he feeds the pigs, he kicks a pig.

He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.

'How come I don't get any eggs and bacon and why don't I have any milk in my cereal?' he asks.

'Well,' his mother says, 'I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week.

I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either.

I saw you kick the cow, so for a week you aren't getting any milk.'



Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.


The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile and says, 'You gonna tell him or should I?'





Blue Wolf Charters
www.bluewolfcharters.com

 

[ReelAffair]

Why I fired my Secretary.

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on
that morning.

I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and
say,

'Happy Birthday!', and possibly have a small present for me.
As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone ' Happy
Birthday.'
I thought...
Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids... They will remember.
My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast and didn't say a word.

So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat
despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said, 'Good Morning
Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday ! ' It felt a little better that
at least someone had remembered.

I worked until one o'clock , when Jane knocked on my door and said,
'You know, It's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your
Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me.' I
said, 'Thanks, Jane, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day.
Let's go !'

We went to lunch. But we didn't go where we normally would go. She
chose instead at a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two
martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.

On the way back to the office, Jane said, 'You know, It's such a
beautiful day.. We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do
We ?'

I responded, 'I guess not. What do you have in mind ?' She said,
'Let's drop by my apartment, it's just around the corner.'

After arriving at her apartment,
Jane turned to me and said,
' Boss, if you don't mind,
I'm going to step into the bedroom
for just a moment.
I'll be right back.'
'Ok.' I nervously replied.

She went into the bedroom and,
after a couple of minutes,
she came out
carrying a huge birthday cake ...
Followed
by my wife,
my kids,
and dozens of my friends
and co-workers,
all singing 'Happy Birthday'.

And I just sat there...
On the couch...

Naked.

 

[Kisinana]

Alberta fish and game were stocking a few lakes with a new hybrid.
People wanted a fish that tasted like salmon would survive like there own walleye and fight like northern muskie.
After a few attempts they came up with the Sokawalski.
The fish tastes like a sockeye, can survive even the coldest of winters and fights like there is no tomorrow.
They say they will be introducing them to the lakes as soon as the teach it how to swim.